SNIPPETS

NOVEMBER 9,  2009

CURITIBA, Brazil, Nov. 8 (UPI) -- Stunned relatives tried to jump out a window when a man presumed dead showed up at his own funeral in southern Brazil, officials said. "In my 10 years in this business, I have never witnessed a scene like this," said Natanael Honorato,  manager of the funeral home in Brazil's Parana state.

Oh, come on, this is nothing.  In Chicago they would have sent him to the nearest polling place.

NOVEMBER 8,  2009

DETROIT, Nov. 7 (UPI) -- A married Detroit man says he can't be accused of bigamy because he didn't say "I do" in a marriage ceremony to a second woman.  Eugene Pallisco, 44, testified Friday in Oakland County Circuit Court that his marriage to Lesley Keith, 38, was a sham and Keith knew it.  Keith, who now lives in Las Vegas, is suing Pallisco for damages in excess of $25,000 for emotional distress, the Detroit Free Press reported Saturday.

Witnesses contradict his "no I do" claim.  You see, you have to record everything these days.