IS THIS SERIOUS? – AT 8:13 P.M. ET:  At one time, this would have been considered an April Fool's joke.  But it's actually serious, and it's a classic example of left-wing journalism presented without shame, or even a wink.  The publication is Britain's fashionably left Guardian.  The writer, Suzanne Goldenberg, has been following the party line for years.  You can't make this up:

America's love affair with the automobile could be sputtering to an end. Some 14m cars were taken out of action in 2009, 4m more than rolled off the assembly lines and onto the roads, a report from the Earth Policy Institute said today.

Whaa?  We don't love our cars anymore?  As Johnny Carson used to say, "I did not know that."  Do you think the recession might have something to do with those figures, Suzanne?  Or Suzie?  Or Ms. Marx, or whatever? 

Of course, you see "Earth Policy Institute" and you know where this stuff comes from.

It was the first time more cars were scrapped than sold since the second world war, reducing the size of the US car fleet from an all-time high of 250m to 246m.

That's less than two percent. 

Last year was an extraordinarily bad year for the US auto industry. Two of the three big car makers — GM and Chrysler — went through bankruptcy and were bailed out by the US government. Sales fell 21.2% from 2008 and the total sales volume was the lowest since 1982. Many consumers held off buying new cars because of fears of losing their jobs.

Ah, she got something right.  Recession.  Recession.  And yes, our car makers are in trouble.  But what about that worker's paradise, Sweden, once known for great cars?  Volvo is now owned by the Chinese, and Saab is pretty much history.  And maybe Suzanne should look at her own country, Britain.  Who owns Rolls-Royce this year?  I think it's the Germans, the guys we beat not many decades ago.

This is the worst economic downturn since the great Depression.  But Americans don't love their cars any less. 

The Obama administration's efforts to spur demand by offering motorists up to $4,500 on trade-ins of older cars and pick-up trucks saw 700,000 older models taken off the road. But that did not affect the total number of vehicles on the road because consumers could only take advantage of the scrappage scheme if they replaced their old clunkers with new more efficient vehicles.

Lester Brown, president of the Earth Policy Institute, said the slump in car sales goes beyond the economic recession. Americans may finally have decided that — with cars — enough is enough. The country now has 246m licensed cars for 209m licensed drivers.

Yes indeed.  Haven't you all heard your friends and relatives saying, "Enough is enough.  Down with these miserable, capitalist gas burners.  I'll walk!"  Why, I hear it every day.  And of course teenagers are shunning cars, and moving toward bikes.  I know it, I know it.

"This is not a one-time event. We expect the shrinkage to continue into the indefinite future," Brown told a conference call today.

The automobile is one of the greatest instruments of equality in history – allowing people of average means to do what only the wealthy once could.  Maybe that's why all these snotty elitists hate it so much.  Who are those peasants out there who want to do what we do?

Remember, if you want to get invited to the trendiest parties, say something nasty about your car today.  And declare that you won't go to Disney World unless you can travel by hydrogen-powered bus. 

Then start waiting.

Yuch.

January 7, 2009